Friday, November 7, 2008

Kitchen Bed

"KYSUM? Plaze?"

Tania decided to throw out some pillows. One wasn’t bad enough to throw out, although it was unacceptable for our use. It was on the “pillow fence.” If there is such a thing? If you can’t use it, shouldn’t you throw it out? Instead, Tania decided to make a “kitchen bed” out of it for Beckett.

We gave up trying to train Beckett a long time ago. “I DO WHAT I WANT!” he says in Cartman voice. There’s a glimmer of hope in the “sit” and “stay” categories, but that’s about the limit of his obedience. He knows how to eat, and he knows how to beg. He’s also really good at barking. He also enjoys pooping behind the couch. Although we can’t take credit for the training involved in those behaviors. He’s a smart dog—sort of—but he uses his powers for evil. So I’m not sure why Tania is consumed with the idea of training him to sit in his kitchen bed.

I think she got the idea of the kitchen bed because since we renovated the kitchen, Beckett has taken to snuggling on the mat below the sink. Beckett is a creature of comfort and one thing he does not like is cold, hard floors. But we don’t like a dog under foot when working at the sink. So the old pillow is on the floor between the sink and the oven. Beckett, naturally, prefers the dirty mat under our feet.

"What? You gots some foods? Plaze."

“Kitchen bed!” Tania says pointing to the pillow. “Kitchen bed!” She’s had some success, but for the most part he just sits next to it looking up at her confused. “Kitchen bed!… Kitchen bed!… ” She’s starting sound like the crazy Hungarian lady across the street that calls for her cats all night.

But it’s nice to have Beckett in the kitchen now while we’re cooking. Even though he is constantly under foot, incessantly trolling the floor in search of crumbs. Which, of course, is the greatest benefit of having a hungry dachshund in your kitchen: perfectly clean floors. “Kitchen bed!”


Unknown said...

Here's a Battle for you.

Bacon Vs Fries

of course Bacon is winning,

Anonymous said...

the raddest part is how you only have to have a 12" board to keep him sequestered in his area. gary must love that shit.

elastic back said...

seeing the difficultly in training a dog, have you ever so much as attempted to train gary? where, might i ask, does gary sleep?

my girlfriend, camille, and i have a cat, kocik (pronounced koh-cheek, polish for kitty), who has 3 or 4 places to sleep during the day, but the second we go to bed, here she comes, clambering over us to nestle down atop camille's head. we have tried everything to entice kocik to sleep elsewhere, but she will just forsake us and end up atop camille's head without apology. we left kocik at camille's parents' place on a recent trip to the west coast and once we returned and brought kocik home, she was back to sleeping on camille's head without a pause. sigh.